Scruggs Nation: Zach was ‘halfway’ home

As best as I can understand it, the younger Scruggs didn’t report directly from the prison to the halfway house, but instead went to the middle of Oxford, near the old Scruggs Law Office, and had lunch with his family. Close family friend and former Mississippi AG Mike Moore was quoted in the story as saying Zach stopped “to have lunch in his hometown and visiting his kids, then people started calling and blogging.” Calling and blogging. Sure, it must have been startling, people might have thought they were having flashbacks to the old days, hallucinations, like you walk into a restaurant and you see Winston Churchill having a burger with Lizzie Borden, or something. Must have had folks checking to see if someone laced their water with PCP. Folks probably didn’t know what they’d see next, maybe Dickie himself bursting through the door in an Elvis get-up, with some fake Elvis hair piled up to the ceiling and gyrating his pelvis while singing Jailhouse Rock, just like in this unintentionally hilarious video, backed by a chorus of jailbirds.

There seems to be some dispute about what happened. Some officials say Zach was late reporting to the halfway house, but his lawyers say he was 15 minutes early. Supposedly, there will be hearing later this week to determine his fate, and at this hearing, I guess we will see if this “15 minutes early” thing is yet another creative flight of lawyer language, the typical Scruggsian prose stylings like the fake and non-existent “insiders” Dickie Scruggs claimed to have in State Farm headquarters in Bloomington, Illinois. (The fact Scruggs ever claimed this, which he did as a kind of head-fake psych-out strategy against State Farm, shows the danger of believing your own p.r. It is little known, but about that same time, Scruggs also publicly boasted that he could stretch out his arms, spin them rapidly in a circle and fly like a helicopter).

David Rossmiller
Insurance Coverage Blog
3/4/9