Gary Pettus: A science textbook from the future

With the deadly threat of humanoid feet no longer hanging over it, another pervasive form of life, Periplaneta americana, commenced to flourish in even greater numbers, expanding its influence and already extensive range.

The species now enjoys a dominion that stretches to the farthest reaches of the earth — or what’s left of it — aided in great part by a series of evolutionary advances: walking upright on two of its six legs, developing vocal cords, and creating a spoken and written language, along with weapons of mass destruction.

Members of the species believe their eternal survival was assured with the recent rise of a powerful, ruling Alpha Male whose ascension depended in great part on his promise to “Make the American Cockroach Great Again.”

Gary Pettus
Clarion Ledger